A lot of shit has been happening to me lately, stuff that i could never of seen coming

It makes me sick to see the person i've become

how i'm everything i hate and everything i never wanted to be


Dear you,
Nobody that reads this is going to understand what I'm writing. If you were to read it you'd understand, you'd be mad, and this would escalate even farther.

Truth is, i feel cheated on. I feel like I'm just another girl, kinda like her. Only she doesn't know it. You try to come off so complicated so girl's don't try to see through you. Well, i have this problem. i over think everything. and because of that, I've seen through everything. I don't like it. Yet I'm still going to your house on Friday

because even if it is a lie, being told what you want to hear is nice for a change.

Today was a chance for me to realize, being with you means a roller coaster or emotions. One ride that I'm NOT willing to get on, yet i continue to stick by you.
It's some nasty disease i have, some part of me, deep down needs you. as sick as that sounds, it's like i can't let go even though you screw me over countless times.
Even though you have made my life a complete mess.
Even though ever since i met you my life has been spiraling out of control

i can't shake you. Every time i say I'm done with you, you surprise me.
It's a continuous thing, and it's making me sick (literally)

i can't sleep
i can't eat
and i can't stand it.

i wish i could be strong because i know you're playing me
i know i don't mean anything to you

but for some reason i'm okay with that
and for some sick reason, i love you

i know for a fact that i'm not IN love with you, because i know what that's like and this isnt it


it's just the sick twisted story of a clingy 13 year old trying to find someone that cares

^^ how sappy

You just don't know what it's like to be on the verge of a breakdown and have nobody answer their phone. or for everyone to tell you that their busy

it's really not the best feeling

this is the 3rd time I've snapped in the past 3 months

if i snap again, there wont be anymore pieces.